Saturday, 6 July 2013

Life= dull

Well. Mental crisis averted. I thought everyone have completely forgotten about me as i had no messages on facebook, twitter or my phone and i felt the loneliest i had ever been in a while. Even everyone at home either had work or school. It sucked. I had no communication with anyone and had that constant feeling that talking to anyone would just annoy them. But here's the funny part; My phone had crashed and wasn't receiving or sending any messages...so when i rebooted my phone and found 5 new messages, it restored my faith of some friendships i have. 
I try not to think too deeply about the silly things that my friends do that they don't realise hurt my feelings, because i think i'm just being a silly self-centered little child. But i can't help it sometimes. When your friends forget to invite you to something or don't wait just a few minutes more for you or don't realise that you're feeling down, it hurts. I tell myself that "i should get used to it again. You put up with it for 10 years of education, you can put up with 2 more...", but it's harder this time because i thought this group would be different. No. These are just the same as every other freakin' year of my life.
So i've decided that i can't wait to make new friends in college and see if they might appreciate me more. Don't get me wrong i do have 2 close friends that do stick by me, but they have other friends that i can't really fit in with and i don't expect them to stick around just for me but i know they care none the less, and i do love them for that.
I feel like i've done nothing but moan on here. Sorry. Also, apologies that i haven't been posting as regularly as i did before, i don't really have an excuse for it, i just haven't had anything to write about to be honest...

Bub-bye for now bloggers.

I'm not pushing you out i swear i just can't open up without it hurting and as much as you think you can, you can't stop the pain. Sorry.

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